Girl, You'll Be A Woman Soon

We have been riding our bicycles as a family often this past summer. Emma has her own sweet bike, and Abbie and I have two new cruisers. A chariot-like two seat cart is Ellie's vehicle and great love during our expiditions. She sits in the back and sings, eats, reads, and plays with toys. It is a great workout for the cart driver, and Ellie keeps interesting company as well.

Upon completing one such ride, my wife pulled the little one up our extremely steep driveway, into the backyard. Abbie was parking the bike and huffing from the last push of energy. Ellie was chatting with her pedaling chauffeur.

"Why are you breathing like that?" Ellie asked.
"I'm tired from the ride" answered Abbie.
Ellie agreed and proclaimed that she wasn't tired at all. Probably attempting to avoid any excuse for a potential nap.
"Well, maybe you can pull me in the cart next time?" her mother joked. Ellie paused,giggled, and answered, "Naw, not with your big helmet, and not with your big hair..." she began.
"Don't you dare say big butt!" Abbie thought to herself.
"... and your big boobies." the three-year old finished.

Ellie is full of strangely angled questions. Coupled with her recent fascination on female anatomy, she hit Grammy with this doosey recently.
"Grammy, do you have big boobies?"

What are we to do?

Last week the girls were home from school (Thanks Columbus!) and were watching a favorite film. Suddenly Ellie runs to me with her blanket and asks if I can help her to get "boobies."

Not knowing how to assist with such a request, I tempered it down and tried to tie the blanket around her like a gown.
"NO!" she screamed. "I want boobies like Emma!"
I looked up at her sister who was engrossed in the movie. She had stuffed her blanket into her shirt creating prosthetic breasts. I stuffed the blanket into Ellie's shirt and satisfied her feminine need. Here is the outcome.

Sitting, Waiting, Wishing

Parents should understand my dilemma. I hope.

It was a wonderful fall day. We had spent the first half of it visiting a local pumpkin patch and fall festival. We played games, took a tractor hay ride, and participated in a fun scavenger hike. The girls were joyous and so were we. The second half of the day was filled with a series of errands to multiple stores across the town. By the end of the day, we were all getting hungry, but we didn't care to come home to cook a meal. Before we left the far side of town to come home, we took a vote, and all agreed that we would go to the Buffalo Wild Wings restaurant. The estimated time of travel to finally get to Wild Wings was probably 20 minutes.

2 Minutes into Trip
Ellie yells, "I want to eat!!"
"We are going to Buffalo Wild Wings right now, kiddo." Abbie informed the back seat driver.

4 Minutes into Trip
"I want Buffado Wide Wins!" hollers Ellie emphatically.
"Ellie, we just told you that we are going there right now. We just have to get across town." I reminded.

7 Minutes into Trip
"Mommy, I'm hungry." the nearly four-year old informed her mother.
"Ellie, we are going to eat right now. We will be there in just a few minutes. Please just be quiet." Abbie pleaded.

10 Minutes into Trip
"I'M HUNGRY!!" she screamed.
"Hey! We just told you, again, we are going to Buffalo Wild Wings. We will eat as soon as we get there. Be quiet and just be patient, would you?" Both Abbie and I were starting to get angry as the traffic became congested.

12 Minutes into Trip
The traffic was thick, but we were almost through the worst before arriving at the area that would thin out.
"I want to go to Bufadoes..." she began.
I quickly interrupted, as I slammed on the brakes avoiding a fender bender, "You need to get the shit out of your ears and be quiet."
I signaled and turned into the left lane that had a few less vehicles in it before I realized Ellie was returning words from my sudden outburst.
"You need to get the shit out of your mouth, Daddy!" she declared.